Mastering The Art of Being Alone pt.2

Being more and more like Christ is my constant motivation daily. My souls desire is to be like him in everything I do. When Christ walked the earth he was said to have a busy life. Healing the sick, giving sight to the blind, leading his disciples, and following the direction of his Father every moment of his earthly life. This is what makes Christ such a great example of LOVE because he sacrificed his life for GOD and the people of GOD because Jesus understood that discipline and order leads to a mastered life. In the scriptures it says, Afterwards he went up into the hills by himself to pray. Night fell while he was there alone~Matthew 14:23. Seeking solitude was important for Christ. Jesus I believe understood the power of spending time with GOD and reflecting on what it is that GOD wants for his life. What a powerful teacher Christ is! He led by example! He made time for GOD and also for himself.

Making time for GOD and for ourselves is vital to our relationship with GOD and with our self. How do you build a relationship with someone you only spend time with every once in a while? How do you know yourself if you never or rarely spend time alone? The answer is you can't! Jesus understood this truth. In order to have a relationship with ourselves it first starts with GOD! Going to GOD in prayer and mediation is a spirit building exercise that will free you from the cares of this world. The stress of your job, feeling that your are single and nobody wants you, or everyone is in a happy relationship but you. All that stuff goes out the window when we build a deeper relationship with GOD. Because what happens is through GOD we gain strength. How do you think Jesus The Christ was able to walk the earth without worry of approval, or acceptance from others? He knew who he was, a child of GOD! Through that relationship we are healed and free! Praise the LORD! When Christ sacrificed his life for us on Calvary his intent was for us to live blameless lives. To not be bound by the cares if this world. To hold on to the promise of our heavenly Father. In order to know what that promise is we must spend some of our time alone. In solitary.

The thought of being alone is scary for some. The idea that no one will be there to comfort them physically makes some people literally fearful and it keeps them repeatedly going from relationship to the next relationship. Leaving no time for healing or any personal development. This creates a bad pattern in relationships. This is why I do not know how some folks are disappointed when their relationships do not workout. The reality is they do not have a relationship with themselves. Instead of spending a season of their life in solitary, they allow fear to motivate them to go into another unhealthy relationship. Our soul desires relationships. This deep longing is why we constantly want companionship. There becomes a deep seeded feeling that something is missing from our lives. It is natural to long for LOVE. In Genesis GOD made man and women because he said we were not made to be alone. The desire for a mate was put inside us from birth! What is not natural is the desperate attempts we make to fulfill our soul desire for LOVE! Which brings me back to my Aries South node and Libra North node.

The desperate North Node Libra would go out and find LOVE without realizing that LOVE has been there within the whole time. This is why my South node in Aries is a blessing. The reason is this influence allowed me to go deep within and spend time alone. By being alone I challenged myself to work through my emotions. I understood that in order for me to have a relationship with GOD, with myself, my family, and community, I had to start at the very beginning. I had to start with the source of all creation and build a solid foundation within.

Genesis is our best history lesson on building foundations. It tells us about our first mothers and fathers Adam and Eve and their natural desire to be close to one another. Adam said At last! She is part of my own flesh and bone! she will be called 'woman', because she was taken out of man~Genesis 2:23. That verse gives me chills! I pray for a man to say those words to GOD when he meets me! At last, Adam said to GOD. The women I prayed for my whole life. What a blessing ladies for a man to have that much favor in you! Adam's attraction to Eve was pure because she was in her natural form. She was the complete image of GOD. She was whole and new! She was pure and had never sinned! Adam made the connection because he seen himself in her. She was made of GOD's image and so was he! When we connect to our source, our creator, our GOD we are made whole! Being created in GOD's image we are LOVE because GOD is LOVE! So the feeling of being lonely and not good enough is not from GOD. In GOD we are prefect and pure. When we are one with GOD we have peace within. When Eve ate the forbidden fruit the bible says she was embarrassed and hid behind leaves. She no longer saw herself in the image of GOD. When we refuse to be alone we are saying we are ashamed of who we are. This fear makes us hide from GOD!

We hide when we won't look at ourselves in the mirror our soul reflect. We hide in relationships, we hide with our work, we hide with being everyone savior. In order to gain the freedom our soul craves we have to master the art of being alone. This freedom comes in many forms. It depends on the lesson GOD has for you! What I know for sure is in order to have the LOVING healthy relationships our soul craves we have to find the courage to be in solitary where you go to your scarce place and sit! When we truly have been healed and strengthened GOD will order our steps and prepare us for our beloved to arrive.

I am following my North node in this season of my life. I am the opposite of most people. Instead of fearing being alone, I fear being in a serious relationship! I have mastered the art of being alone and it is time for me to get out and greet the world! With an open heart and mind, I will be a happy single women with her heart open for LOVE. Embracing my need to be whole I will constantly spend time in solitary even when I am in a romantic relationship. Because now that my foundation is made it is up to me to nurture it. I know how to give myself what I need. I no longer search outside of myself for the LOVE I know that is within me! As my soul guides me to my beloved I know my reflection will draw him to me. I do not have to search for LOVE. I don't have to go out every weekend to be noticed by LOVE. Why? Because he is already in me. Just like LOVE is already inside of you!

Mastering The Art of Being Alone pt1

The path to LOVE begins when you realize that separation, loneliness, and the pain of isolation are real~Deepak Chopra. I remember like it was yesterday. I was 25 years old and I just graduated from college. I lived at home with my grandparents and still searching for a job. Feeling desperate, lonely, and anxious was a everyday experience. I made a habit of finding what was wrong with me and fixing it. Feeling UNLOVABLE I constantly sought LOVE from other places outside of myself. Fearing being alone forever I constantly dreamed and prayed for a husband who would make me complete. He would make me happy! As GOD would have his way this image was broken the day I read in Essence Magazine "NO Man Can Make You Happy". I have said that line to myself over and over like most people. But until that day it never sank in. Finally reality hit! Separation became real. The pain of being by myself became real. I broke down! I cried. I became angry. I said to myself if a man can't make me happy what is the point of being in a relationship? Boy, did I have a lot to learn.

I share that story because so many people still feel deep down inside wither they want to admit it or not that they believe someone will save them from themselves. The desire for LOVE for most people is motivated by fear or fantasy. In one of my favorite books The Path To LOVE Deepak Chopra writes about how most people live with images in their heads of the fantasy relationship that no one will live up to or the fear that they are not LOVABLE at all. Both extremes is what keeps romance at bay. To master the art of being alone or in solitary we have to embrace the reality that we are the only ones that are responsible for our own happiness. The day I realized this my life has not been the same.

Happiness is subjective. It looks and feels different to different people. That is why the journey is so important to do it alone. Yes, that is right I said it. ALONE *dun dun dun*! In order for us to reach new levels in ourselves we have to spend time in solitary. Being in solitary is being in your scarce place. Spending time alone does not mean using all your time and energy wondering when your soul mate will come. Spending time alone is nurturing your spirit/soul so your soul will seek out and draw your mate to you. Understanding this will set you free! There is nothing you can do to be more attractive to a person than nurturing and LOVING yourself!

In astrology you have what is called North node and South Node. South node is what we do naturally. Our North node is the direction our soul craves for us to go. Many astrologers make South nodes to be negative and North nodes to be positive. In order to be balanced and whole beings I believe it is wise to embrace both sides, our whole selves. My South node is in Aries. This shows my independent spirit. The part of me that does not understand why the whole world wants to be in a relationship. Being a solider for Christ is natural because I am a warrior! Having my South node in Aries makes me a natural leader and gives me a desire to be first at everything! My North node is in Libra. The polar opposite! This part of me is very ideal. I see romance and beauty in everything! My soul craves peace and harmony within. I am a natural visionary under this influence and all I see is a white picket fence 2.5 kids and a dog, hahaha.

How does one embrace both? Great that you ask! This is what we master when we are alone. In solitary we seek unity within. Reconnecting to yourself, the one you abandoned for the world! Living a solitary lifestyle I can hear clearly what GOD wants from me. I can see now that it is natural for me to be alone being that my South node influence is in Aries. GOD helped me to see that there is nothing wrong with being in a LOVING relationship, but everything must be done in order. Not out of fear or desperation! My disappointment with the reality of LOVE gave me a "me against the world" attitude. Needing someone made me feel powerless and that is not a natural feeling for me. Realizing this truth gave me the power I thought I would loose. I felt empowered by being honest with myself! Coming full circle is what leads us to our North node. Finally able to embrace the negative inside yourself encourages you to be better. My soul craves unity and a solid foundation in a relationship. In order to build solid foundations we must first start within. Going into a relationship without a solid foundation within yourself is like building a house on quick sand! As soon as reality hits and issues arise as they will everything will fall apart!

Find the courage to spend time in solitary. Ask your self honest questions like "would I marry me"? Spending a season of your life alone could be just what GOD wants to take you to the next level. At the next level there will many opportunities that wait for your arrival! Next will be Mastering The Art of Being Alone pt2.